I just have a bunch of random babble on my brain.
I guess first and foremost, I had a great Sunday night. I wasn't planning to post about it and well I still don't plan to say much. Why? No reason, just some things I like to share and some things I like to hold in my pocket. I posted his link so that should fill you all in.
I don't know what it was about last night, but it felt really good!
I guess really the thing I want to talk about is fighting. Is it possible to still be tired from all the fighting I did in my marriage even after being divorced for nearly a year and separated for almost 2 years?? Because I am still really tired from it. I don't want to be in a relationship with a lot of fighting. Some is normal, some can be resolved. It is unrealistic to think people that are close that are around each other a lot that have shared space, shared bills, etc.... But ya know daily stress, daily tension and daily fights, I just can't handle.
Well here is the thing that we talked about last night. See his buddy just shacked up with this chic. First I want to say, I got all kinds of creeped out when I met her. Not a good vibe coming off of that chic. They were fighting. It happens. I have moved OMG so many times and it is stressful. Understandable. However, he seemed a little reluctant to go back in the house. Poor Buddy!
He started the conversation out by saying that Goofball and I don't seem to fight, that we seem like a good couple (ha!).... He went so far as to say we should get married (or something like that, can't remember the EXACT words). (double ha, ha!). Goofball and I were both like "Oh hell no!"..... Been there, done that, got the baggage to prove it.
We both pretty much said that we don't want to get back into something because of fighting (other reasons too, but I know my big one is fighting).... Yep, yep!
And, really we aren't together enough to fight. Actually I like what we have because I do not take it for granted. I really appreciate and really enjoy our time together. Especially the sex, did I mention the sex? (sigh....) Sorry got sidetracked.
But, what I didn't say last night is that if I were to get remarried, I would be quicker to find a solution, compromise quicker and be a lot pickier about which battles I want to fight. I don't think I would be such a nag, such a bitch. Really the second time around, I want someone I can enjoy life with. I want to laugh. I want to just have a friend, companion... not just a husband. (Yes I should have had this the first time but it is a must for the second time around)
Now I am still no where near ready to get remarried. I'm not opposed to it someday but I just can't see it in the next year or two being on the top of my list of "to-dos".... Oh hell no. More like a 2-3 year plan before I truly even think about it. I mean life could change but I don't see my thinking change too much.
So anyway that's all I had to say.....
Monday, May 21, 2007
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