Monday, February 18, 2008

Divorce with kids doesn't mean the relationship ends....

Since we have kids, I still have to talk with my ex from time to time. Also, since he doesn't live here, I end up having long phone conversations with him to keep him up to speed, but he tends to ramble. I am getting used to it and, I realize I have to be nice, friendly, polite when we talk even when I want to scream.

However, I think I am getting better, much better with these conversations. In fact, I just got off the phone with him and he was rambling about how he and his girlfriend just bought a new car together. Fine. It didn't bother me at all this time to hear him talk about him, her and their life.

So the resentment and anger are melting as I knew it would. I am sure these feelings will come back from time to time but I do feel better about things.

I know that I will have to have some kind of relationship with him and at some point his girlfriend too because I do realize she is the one. I keep waiting for him to say they are getting married, because I know it is coming. So I just make the best of it all because I am actually happy for him and plus I am very happy with my life. Very happy!!!

I also feel it is important to the children that they see we can be friendly and get along. I want to set a good example for them and I try in everything I do. This is no exception. It has been a struggle but I am getting there. Slowly but I am, and like I said, I am sure there will be more hurdles and bumps but I will just handle them as well as I can and with my children in mind.

6 comments:

Sizzle said...

it sounds like you are handling it very maturely even though it can't be easy. it is good the kids can see you being friendly. i know that must be hard sometimes but it's good you like your life!

BeautifulDisaster said...

It is so tough. You sound like you are doing so much better!! You've got great perspective and I'm sure that friends will come.

stef said...

Hi - my name is Stefan from www.diyfather.com. I've just come across your site - could you please contact me by email? I'd like to discuss a potential link / article exchange.

Many thanks

Stefan

stefan@www.diyfather.com
www.diyfather.com

trappedintime said...

In a twisted since, it may even broaden your contact base.

belinda/shuttle mom said...

It's good for the kids and your sanity. One of my daughters went through divorce and they were NOT civil towards one another. The kids suffered the most. My daughter almost had a nervous breakdown.
It sounds like you have found a balance. I'm proud of you.

Karen said...

You are such a gracious woman dealing with it like this. It's not easy setting your feelings apart for the sake of the children, but you're doing it with poise and style.