Sunday, February 15, 2009

Looking at the past to find myself

I have been spending a lot of time on Facebook. I originally joined for work as a networking thing and also to learn the ins and outs of it because I have teenagers and I need to know about these social networking sites.

For a long time I resisted looking for my high school classmates. I hated HS and was very socially immature back them. I remember so many embarrassing things that I did or said and I hate to think that people will remember that way. But there are many people that I truly do want to know how they are doing and others I have gotten in touch with through the years, and then lost touch.

Heck I don't even think I will be going to my 20th HS Reunion but it is still about 2 yrs away so who knows. Maybe by opening this door to my past I can mend some of the bridges, fix the fences and just in general get some closure on my past. I figured if people get a look at my life now and who I have became, they would also forget the way I used to be.

I do realize we all change from the people we were in HS. After all, it was 18 yrs ago and we were still children though trying to be adults. We went to college or to work, we have gotten married and some divorced. We have kids now and have responsibility that we just didn't have in HS.

I do like me now. I like me a lot. I think I am a good person, fun to be around and I know when enough is enough..... most of the time! I would be my friend if I were me. So maybe in a few years when it is time for our reunion and due to the fact that I have now opened that door, I might just go and I might just have fun!


Jems said...

Oh,I would sooo urge you to go! I too have spent hours on Facebook and I've caught up with so many old schoolfriends and it's been wonderful to see them and hear them again. Primarily we've all matured and moved on from the bitching and mickey taking and have fond memories of each other and past 'crimes' have been long forgotten. Also, the 'wasters' at school seem to have done so well for themselves and the boys have matured so much and become really lovely men. I had a friend over for dinner this week who I hadn't seen in 21 years and it was just like I'd last seem him days ago. I think it's imperative to embrace your past. If the people are still dogs, you need never see them again, but also, you could forge some great friendships and draw lines under issues you may never have the chance to again. You know I think you're special and we've never even met - so there are probably some people from school who'd be thrilled to see you again :0)

margaret (the misanthrope) said...

Wow, how neat! I have not joined FB but know lots of folks who have. I have often pondered the same thing - would I want to reconnect with people from high school, online or in real life? Like you, I hated HS and couldn't wait to get out.

In my case, I hadn't yet accepted that I am NOT the bubbly cheerleader type, and thus am not and will never be the "popular" girl. Back then, I thought that there was something wrong with me or that I wasn't "good enough". But now I realize that that is OK and I am fine just the way I am! People just have to work a little harder to get to know me. And hopefully the ones who stick around and put in the effort, are true friends :-)

Also, I went to HS when we were living in Europe, so as far as I know, reunions aren't the done thing. So I guess I might never have to make that decision. Good luck to you and keep us posted on what happens!

A Single Mom's Life said...

OMG!! We are so much alike. I was terrorized growing up. I had no interest in going to my reunion. After the reunion was over (last october) I had jumped onto facebook...suddenly those that did not know I exist think they are my best Ummm wanna be friends with me...get to know me. Who cares that we went to school together 20 years ago.

Ugh anyways...I wish I would have gone now..because I saw the photos..I look better than 95% of those people do now. LOL

KimboSue said...

Hopefully all those idiots have grown up and you can actually socialize like real adults...

trappedintime said...

My 20 year passed just last year. I didn't go, and by the looks of the registry and attendance notes, I didn't miss a thing. It looks like the same crowd that always did that kind of thing, just did it again. I wouldn't have socialized with anyone. Most of the people I knew and hung out with were ahead of me, by the time I was a senior I knew no one and was only going for a half a day anyways. It also looked like alot of them were classic late 80's losers (haha).

TxGambit said...

It is funny to see so many just like I was. I have been enjoying reconnected on Facebook. I have also found a bunch of my ole Navy buds so that is a blast. Those are the folks that got to see me! I had come out of my shell by then and it was before the scars of the divorce.

I guess part of my problem with the reunion is I have no memories of HS to share... Like, "Remember that Homecoming game when.... " or "Oh remember Coach Smith's class when...." I have none of those memories. Okay maybe classroom ones but not really. I didn't hang out with many at my school, everyone was from other schools and/or different age group than me... mostly older but some younger.


Like Bowling for Soup says, "High school never ends."