Not bad, just different. This is the first Christmas that the ex isn't here for Christmas eve and Christmas morning. Even last year, though we were officially divorced, he came and stayed with us. He helped do the Santa stuff too.
It hit me today as I was typing out "... and the kids will go with him for Christmas night." that this is the first year that I have to hand my kids over to him for the holiday.
I know that I am lucky to have them most of the "holiday" part. Most of the hoopla is over by the evening when he will be getting them.... but they get to have a "second" Christmas with him. (ha, ha, they know it too)
This is also the first year that I won't have them for New Year's as well. I plan to enjoy the break and know that they will enjoy being with their dad but it is a little bittersweet too.
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year's and Happy.... well whatever you celebrate!