I'm back and a party

Sooo I made it back after a very successful work trip. Had an awesome time in New Orleans. Good food and good people. I did miss Goofball while I was gone... I know its weird because its not like I get to see him everyday. Lately it has been once a week.... sometimes twice a week and even sometimes not at all in a week.

Anyway, came back last night (Friday) and today we are having a party.... K is having a party. So I have a house full (ask Goofball) of kids.... ranging from 14 down to say age 5 (my youngest). It is fun.... Goofball came over. Sooo cute, he wore a costume. I think he had fun laughing at the kids or me, I'm not sure which. Either way it was great to see him.

So the party is going on all around me. Since most of the kids are 7th and 8th graders, and there are boys and girls, it is a lot of drama. They keep running from the back yard to the front to the back to the front.... And the girls keep running in groups to K's room and the bathroom. They boys keep trying to scare the girls by hiding and then jumping out. All of them have their cell phones and keep calling other kids that aren't here and kinda bragging about how they are at this party.

There is about an hour left before I start kicking people out. And, I can't wait! I'm exhausted.

Soooo that is the news from my edge of the world.

Travelin' for work

Tomorrow I'll be back in New Orleans for the third time in about 6 mths. Not sure if I'm looking forward to it or not. I mean on one hand yeah cuz they have great food, it is a different city and I get a break from the kiddos. But, then I will be working my tail off! and I will miss my kids and while I don't normally see Goofball during the week, I know I will miss him in a way too cuz I know I'm hours away. I know I'm weird, oh well.

Anyway, back this weekend.

EJ has left the building.

Another saturday night and.....

I'm an affectionate person. I like to touch, kiss, hug and I like to be touched, kissed and hugged.

My ex was not. He didn't hold my hand. The few times he did, I could tell he didn't want to. So it just felt wrong. He kissed me but only to initiate sex.... and then it was over as quick as it started. He didn't kiss me during. Just some kissing before and it was over. Now on this note, I have never had sex with someone that I didn't like to kiss so this was something that changed in him really quickly. We used to kiss a lot when we first started dating but.... it didn't last even the first year. Then on the hugging. He would let me hug him but rarely did he put his arms around me.

*sigh*

Oh well moment over.

So tonight I enjoyed all three and it was so nice. I think it makes the sex better too. I mean for me, not sure if it does for him.... (grin)

Anyway, another wonderful, amazing night with Goofball. He looked damn sexy tonight, more than usually.... Yum. I was having a really hard time tending to the food because really all I wanted to do was drag him to the floor or the bed or where ever. I had to have him.

Thanks for a fun night, Goofball. Glad you enjoyed dinner and dessert. It was fun to cook for you. I'm glad everything turned out okay... I wasn't too crazy about the chicken though it wasn't terrible. Next time something with beef. I like beef. I'm from Texas. :)

Anyway, I get the kiddos tomorrow at noon. Gotta drive up half way and pick them up. I'm enjoying my break but I will be glad to get them back. I'm having some weird mommy guilt over handing them over to a man that had just an hour before threatened my cats and then just before walking out half joked about not giving me the kids back. WTF?! So I will be anxious to get to the pick up location and then get my babies back where they belong.

Oh and I'm complaining a lot about money lately but mostly because Dec 25th is just around the corner. I don't really worry toooo much about money. A little but who doesn't? But, right now I'm feeling the pressure of the Big day. It will be fine though. I am just going to work a plan and stick to it. The kids really don't need much and I have already let the big kids know things will be a bit tighter than normal. So we shall see.

And that in a nutshell is my Saturday night. Of course I'm singing "Another Saturday night and I ain't got nobody, I got some money cuz I just got paid..." Love that song!

Another random 7

Aimee over at GreebleMonkey tagged me with the 7 random facts. (Kisses, Aimee!)

Before I get started I wanted to talk about this PIM thing aka Psycho Internet Moms. Now I can't remember who started this, I'm thinking Julie's hubby did. All I remember is it was a hubby.

Anyway, so these PIMs are some of my best friends. They have been in my life for nearly 6 yrs. Wow, has it been nearly 6 yrs??? I guess so. They are my support system when I couldn't share with my family and felt all alone. They have been there for so many things. Talked me through my moves and divorce and my depression. We have shared pregnancies, births, deaths, illness, new jobs, new homes, new pets, recipes and sex stories. We have shared children's firsts, tips on parenting, tips on cleaning, tips on tipping and pictures and so much more.

I can't wait until the day I can say I have meet each and every single one of you.... and I'm getting close!

Okay enough mushy on the random 7.

Not gonna post the rules, ya know 'em, right?

1. I have been to just over half the states in the US. Most of them in a car.

2. I am a horrible speller and I have a lot of trouble with phonics. I can't sound out words. I have tried, tried, tried. I just can't.

3. I'm a really bad house keeper. I hate cleaning! (which is what I'm suppose to be doing right now).

4. I have all kinds of weird things I say. Some are quotes from TV shows, movies and commercials. Some are things we said growing up and then some are just picked up here and there.

5. The same doctor (at the same hospital) that delivered my mom, delivered me and my two younger brothers.

6. I sing in the car. I sing in the shower. I sing all the time. Simon would put on the list of the World's worst.... that's okay, I just don't sing in front of anyone but my kids!

7. I want a dog.


And, that's it. I will not be tagging anyone. Feel free to do it on your own. Let me know if you do! I would love to read it!

Can you hear that?

It is the sound of mom getting a much needed break!

So the dad came alllllll the way from The Big D to get the kiddos. I wish I could say I was happy about that. Oh I am but it meant having him in my house. He has always been an ass about my cats and my housecleaning.... and my weight and a ton of other issues that I could see the gears turning in his head.

As it is, he told me that if he had these cats, he would have fed them to a couple rottweilers. Seriously? You're an asshole!

I don't care. I get a break. I have been so busy at work. Beyond busy! So I really need the rest.

Gonna spend time relaxing (read - sleep), some cleaning and then some time with Goofball too.

That's it. That's my plan. It sounds excellent to me.

FYI - I am going to be uber busy from now until Thanksgiving so if I'm not commenting to your blog, its lack of time and energy, not lack of interest!!!!! And, if I'm not writing much in my own, its pretty much the same reason. I'll be in New Orleans next week! Goooood foood!

I'm been hit.... save yourself!

Ha, ha. Just kidding.... sort of.

Margaret tagged me with a randoms thing meme. Thanks sweetie. I'm going to forgive you because you are still walking around in the lovey dovey, fresh from your wedding day fog. Plus I like ya!

So here are the rules..... Players start with eight random facts and/or habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. At the end of your blog post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged and to read your blog.

Okay so Margaret broke the rules and I plan to as well.... but you will have to wait until the end to see what the broken rule is!

Gosh this is going to be hard because I think I have shared most anything I can think of.....

1. I guess first I will say, I didn't have a wedding ceremony. Justice of the Peace with his boss and some random court house worker that just happened to be in the wrong place, wrong time as our witnesses. Who would have known it would end in divorce?!?!

2. I don't like the smell of microwave popcorn..... at all!

3. I love balloons.

4. I crave information. If I don't know about something, I research. I read. I have to learn.

5. I only get my haircut maybe twice a year.... sometimes, just once a year. But, I do cut my own bangs.... a lot!

6. I do not like scary movies. I also can't stand this time of year when they show all the Halloween movies.

7. I love snowmen! That is my favorite "winter" thing. I could decorate my whole house with snowmen for Christmas/Winter.

8. I love pajamas! I wear them a lot.... a lot, a lot.


Okay so there are my 8. Now I am suppose to tag 8 people.... but here is where I will break the rules. I'm not going to tag anyone. I will say, if you want to do this, do it and leave me a comment so I know to visit your blog!!!!


Enjoy.

Bring on the rain

This song is sung by Jo Dee Messina. It really explains how I feel right now.

Like gosh, I got through another crazy, stressful day... what more could go wrong? how much more can I take of this? But, screw it, I'm up for the challenge.... Bring it on cuz I like the challenge. I'm up for it.

This too shall pass. This too shall pass. This too shall pass.

I mean heck I'm trying to teach my kids this very thing. Be strong. Don't let life get you down, don't cry. Stand up, stand strong and keep on truckin'.

Soooo anyway, this was just something I thought of while driving home stuck in traffic.

Bring on the rain.

(Update: I decided to add the video to it.... as you can see....)

Teaching my daughter to date

.... and learning a little along the way myself!

This is something I never really thought we would be doing at the same time, or I mean I never thought I would be divorced and dating. And while my daughter is still a bit young (13), she is starting to have "boyfriends".... with this and my dating, I am trying to teach her. I also find that I am learning with her and from her. My boys, especially the oldest one, are also a big help. To see things through his eyes.... well, it is a fun and interesting learning experience!

So some of the things I want her to know are:

1. Do not settle for someone that doesn't make you happy, that doesn't respect you and that just is very thoughtless. Do not waste time being unhappy. In that same line of thinking, do not be disrespectful and do not be thoughtless. Make this person happy and you will reap the benefits.

2. Pick your battles. Not everything has to be a fight. Decide what things are important to you and only fight those things. It makes you both a lot happier.

3. Understand the difference between busy and busy. If he does not make time to see you and only contacts you when it is very convenient for him, then he probably isn't into you. But, if he truly is busy, chances are he is going to make time for you when he isn't and he will be excited to see you each time!

4. Observe how he is with other people; most especially with seniors citizens, children and animals. If he is respectful, thoughtful and in general nice to them, he probably will be to you as well. Plus it shows he has good character. (or at least I think so!)

5. Respect guy time. It is important for him to spend time away from you and especially good if you show you trust him and respect him while he does whatever guys do. But also make sure you do stuff yourself. Have a hobby or a good friend or some interest that you can do. Being a couple and being together is great, but having some space can make you appreciate your time together too.

6. Let him be a guy. What ever that means for him, be it silly jokes, goofy behavior, watching Sci-Fi, football every Sunday and Monday. It doesn't matter. Understand this is who he is. Don't try to change him. Don't let him change you either. The point of a relationship is to be yourself and this person should bring out the best in you, not the worst.

7. Communicate your feelings to him. Do not drop hints and do not expect that he can read your mind. He may sometimes get lucky and do what you were wanting but it isn't mind reading. Accept it.

8. Do not play games and do not stay with someone that does.

9. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

10. And lastly, decide what things are important to you, such as, good conversation, a good sense of humor or whatever it is. Find someone that has these things. The bottom line is not to settle. There are too many people out there.

I am sure there are more lessons and more things but for me, right now, these are the most important. I want her to know that she does not have to live unhappy, that she can find someone to fit her standards.

These are good lessons for everyone.... I just hope that I can keep her from making some of the same mistakes I did in the past and while I know she will get hurt, I hope this will minimize that a bit.

Good parenting day!

I admit it a lot of my problems as a parent come with my style of parenting. I am very open and honest with my kids. I am very hands off in a way because I let them express themselves and tend to be more their friend then mom, though I do remind them often of my role. I am bad with discipline and often don't follow through as well as I should.

Also I worry, as I have mentioned before, that my kids are smarter than me. If one day they realize this, I will be in some serious trouble!

With that said, I do not think I'm a bad mom at all. No not at all. I think this just works for us and while it sometimes causes me some stress, overall, we do good together.

Today, though, was just a banner day for me. I am floating, walking on the clouds.... Why? Because all my children were good today. They listened. They each had a good day at school. They listened to me!!! I didn't have to nag. We had a really, really good evening too.

I just feel really good as a parent right now!

Bitter... Party of one

Yeah that is me today. A bit bitter. A lot of resentment surfacing today.

My ex text messaged me today about dates for when he would see the kids again. He wrote down the wrong days but I didn't know until I called him to discuss rather than going back and forth on text messages.

Background: He lives in Dallas. It is roughly 4-5 hours away from us.... by car that is. So he doesn't see the kids often because for him work always comes first. Always. And, if you have been reading this blog for a while, you know that they were with him for 2 months this summer. Well they haven't seen him since.

He plans to see them the weekend of Oct 19th.... Not sure if the girlfriend is coming with him but that was his plan. K doesn't want her to come because she wants time with just her dad. She felt she didn't get enough just dad time because the girlfriend was almost always around. Now I wasn't there so I don't really know how much time she was around .... but hearing from all three kids that she was around a lot, just means she probably was.

So back to the phone call.

I was annoyed with him before I even called him to discuss dates for the kids. I was annoyed because he was text messaging me the wrong dates. We had already talked about this. I was annoyed that he had lied to the kids about the last time I talked to him! I hate that he gets to just be the "fun guy" and I have to always be the bad guy... or at least the one here. Plugged in every single day. I am the one that misses work if the kids have a problem.

So we got the dates down and he starts in with the "small talk".... I'm not wanting to do this part. But, he is just going on and on about this and that. He is in school trying to get his degree. He is always competing with me and really when we were married, I with him. He now wants to get into Human Resources.... That is what I DO! WTF?! I have always talked about being in HR. I have worked in HR before and I'm finally back in it. I'm happy.

But, now he wants to do it too....

But, he was also talking about being a guidance counselor which I thought was just wow... not a good fit for him.

Anywho... basically I got really bitchy. My little passive aggressive self showed its ugly head. I was making rude little comments. But they were the kind that would take you a second to realize I was really being insulting.

I'm not a details person so don't ask what I said.... I have no ideas. I think I said he would be better as a Used Car Salesmen and then said something like no you would be great as a Realtor for Ocean front property in Arizona. Then I said something that I wish I could remember because it was goood, if I do say so myself.

His reply was "thanks.... wait? Was that a compliment or a put down?" Hmm yeah. I said that I am still harboring some anger issues. He said, "Towards me?" Hmmm yeeaahhh, hello.

Anyway, yes I'm angry. Why does he get so much time off as a parent? Why does he not have to be here?

But, yeah know, true to my form, I have to end positive. I am lucky. I am very blessed. He does pay child support. He does call and talk to them. Even though he doesn't see them often, he does. And, while I don't agree with his choices, I am happy for him.

But above it all, I am soooo very glad I am not married to him anymore.

Nothing to say

That's it. I just have nothing to say right now. I have tons of little things I am working on..... I have a notebook and I'm writing tons of notes in it.

Anyway. Kids are great. I am doing well. And, just hanging out when I can with Goofball which is always a good time.

Home life could use a better balance and I am super busy at work.... well actually right now is the calm before the storm. It is that almost creepy stillness just before all hell breaks loose.

And really, that is it. No venting, no complaining, no whining though I'm sure I could find something to say that falls into each of those.... but I won't give in. I will just continue smiling and enjoying life.

Wow

I just had one of the best nights. *grin* The perfect walk on the beach weather.

That is all. I just want to remember this night and putting it in my blog, I will at least know what night it was.

Attitude Matters

Sorry readers, I'm not going to vent here today. I know a small few said I could but I feel so .... I don't know... guilty when I complain or vent. It just sounds petty. Truly it is just trivial stuff.

So rather than bore you with my whining and petty stuff, I'm going to talk about "attitude matters." This is a phrase I have been toting all over work lately.

See I work in HR and my primary focus is college recruiting. Compared to where I have worked before, at this company HR doesn't actually go to the campuses and do the recruiting, rather we have teams from all of our departments that do it for us. We train them as recruiters and they bring us the candidates. I find it interesting because basically they are picking the candidates that will later be their co-workers.

Anyway, sometimes people on the teams will whine about the process. Some much louder than others. This past year we have had a lot of changes to our process and to the software we use. Oh btw, I work in the Information Technology department, this is who we recruit for....

So we have this new database software this past year and being that most of the people that should be using it are Computer Science majors, Electronic Engineers and the like, you would think that they would be okay with changes like this. Nay, not true. I find this software easy peesy but they find it very difficult and I really think it is more resistance to change than the actual software.

Sooooo I have been saying in all the training classes and meetings, Attitude Matters. Meaning if we (HR) have a positive attitude about the changes, then maybe the others would feel better about it. But even some of the folks in HR are whining about the change (it came from much higher up).

And, ya know, I have a lot of little stressors in my life, especially lately. Yet everyday I wake up and rather than dread the day for the things I know will be wrong (kid school problems are not solved... so it happens everyday), I will make myself smile, I will make myself be positive that despite anything that could go wrong, it will be a good day. Even when things go wrong, I still try to shake it off and move on forward with a positive attitude.

Granted I may wallow in it a little bit. I may even vent, whine, complain but it is more a purging action. Get out the toxic feeling because only then I can get it out and feel better.

Still I feel guilty over it because I don't want others to feel bad. I mean overall my life is pretty darn good and I know, I know that others have it worse than me. I have my family, a house, a car, a good job....which someone I love reminded me of this week that others live in much worse conditions.

Life is stressful and full of twists and turns, but it is how we deal with it and our attitude that truly matters.

Full brain

I seem to have writer's block because my brain is full. I can't seem to unblock it and even though blogging is how I normally do it.... I can't seem to get what is in my brain out!

I'm stressed. I'm frustrated. I want to scream. It has all caught up.

So I apologize for the lack of reading material. I apologize for the lack of comments on your own blogs.

I just cannot focus.

I'm going to keep trying and I'm going to be venting to anyone else that will listen and just hope that this clears up.

I love blogging!

September 9

September 9 is always a special day for me. I talked about it here last year too. It was a point in my life that changed the rest of it.

To back up, in May 1992, I was out of high school and had just spent the last year in community college and working full-time at Burger King. I wanted to move out on my own but couldn't afford it, wanted to get out of my life so to speak. I felt like I was at a cross roads. I didn't feel like I could go forward, I definitely couldn't go back. I needed to do something big, life changing and then the recruiter called. I think they have ESP or something.

So I signed on up and my date was picked..... I don't remember my original date because that summer my dad's only sister had a liver transplant and I asked to push my date back so that I could be with my family a little bit longer.

Fine. September 9, 1992 it was.

It was a life changing decision. It was a life changing experience.

And, if you know me, making decisions is not easy for me and especially not something this huge!

I'm glad I did it. Sometimes wish I wouldn't have gotten out. It was a good decision at the time for me and my kids. My life wouldn't be what it is now, had I stayed in. Rather than play the "What if" game, I just enjoy what I have.

Fighting, fighting and more fighting

I can't stand fighting. I hate it. I don't like doing it and I hate it being around me.

My kids fight more than any people I know. It wears me out. I am actually physical ill right now over the fighting. Each day, each week, each month as they get older, it gets worse and worse.

There is a lot of frustration with the age gaps. K&H are 19 months apart, L is 6/12 and 8 yrs younger than the other two....Not planned it just happens. The older two are competitive thanks to their father (yes, seriously). I know a lot of exes will blame things on the other but ask the kids too. He used to compare them with each other when disciplining them. "H why did you do that? K would have never done that, would you K?" Seriously a conversation that was had all the time when they were growing up. It drove me crazy. There was other things like this. With friends, grades, toys, clothes. He could turn everything into comparing them and he did it in front of them. It was usually H being the scapegoat if you will and yet this kid turns to the dad every time something happens.

L as just always tried to keep up with them. He is so far behind and right now he is at an age that he can almost do things but still a little physically and verbally behind. He is getting there slowly.

So today for example. I'm asleep. L and H were awake. L comes and asks me if he could eat some pepperonis that we had. I think I mumbled "Whatever".... he turned to H and said that means yes. H said no it doesn't and then they started arguing. But at least left my room to do it. Next thing I hear is L yelling out in pain and crying. I get up and L is doubled over holding his stomach. He is 100 pounds lighter and almost 7 years younger than H. So of course I ask H what happened and he starts in, "you always blame me!" and so then we start fighting.

I walk off because well 1 I had to pee and 2 I wanted to put my glasses on so I could see! (I can't see without my glasses.)

I come back and H is on the phone with his dad. WTF?! I didn't even have a chance to talk to them both. Yes both because I know L is just as much to blame for the fighting.

I'm pissed. I'm seeing red pissed. Now wait don't get me wrong, he has every right in the World to talk to his dad. I just feel like dad gets to be the good guy and I have to be the bad guy. I guess I signed up for this but .... wait a minute! He did too when we become parents. When we decided we would have unprotected sex so we could have a baby...... both being naive not really thinking it would happen the very first time.... but I'm just sayin', he had a commitment same as me. And where is he? 4-5 hours away. See he gets to be the fun dad, that sees them a few times a year and for a long visit in the summer. He gets to telephone parent. Be the Popsicle Dad.

But, I made a commitment to these kids, these people that I will be here for them. I will be here when they are sick. When they need to talk, need a hug, need school supplies or money or a ride somewhere. I get all the hugs and kisses and "I love you"s.....

If it means I have to endure more fighting to have all the other things, I will do it. I just need to vent sometimes because I soooo can't stand fighting. :)

Quote of the Day

I haven't done one of these in a while.... Enjoy.

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted."

The long weekend and a sick day

I had a nice long weekend. I love my job because I get every other Friday off. This past Friday was my day off. So four day weekend. Whoohooo......

I spent it doing just what I wanted, sort of. Friday was great. Got to spend time with Goofball. Some much needed sex time that is. Gawd I needed that! That's all I will say.

Then napped. Nice deep sleep that one can only have after great sex. Then Friday night took the kids out for dinner. Had a big smile even when Logan was throwing a fit. He is still adjusting to all day without a nap. Takes after his mom.

Then Saturday, I have no idea what we did but before I knew it it was the afternoon and I had done nothing. It was actually kinda nice but also stressful because I had so much to do.

I went to visit my grandmother (mom's mom) who was staying at their house pet sitting while my parents were in Colorado visiting my baby brother and his family. They got some gooood pictures of the boys. Anyway, so visited my grandmother. Showed her the presentation I am working on for my parents' 35 anniversary. She liked it but we started talking about pictures she had. So I called my Aunt and I ended up over there. I got a huge bag full of pictures.

Then on Sunday, got up made breakfast for the kids. They loved it. Then I scanned pictures all day, and cropped, resized, rotated, etc all the pictures and worked on the presentation all day.

Goofball came by and we went out. I was kinda in a weird mood by then. I was looking through family pictures all day and it was weird because there were pictures of my cousin. He committed suicide when he was 15. I think I was around 17 years old at the time. Nobody really talks about him and it is makes me sad. But, Goofball is always fun to hang out with so I was snapped out of it and then I was focusing on not ripping all his clothes off.

Monday I got up and made another good breakfast for the kiddos. Two days in one weekend, they couldn't believe it. Worked some MORE on the presentation.... It takes a long time. My parents were back so we all went to lunch. Then I ended up back over at their house so I could steal the new pictures from Colorado. My nephews are soooo cute! I can't wait to see them again. I would love to get out to Colorado this year.

Anyway, then we just ran errands the rest of the day.

Sometime right before bed H started puking everywhere and I just had a bad feeling. He was up and down all night. Some time in the very early morning, I had a really bad feeling, but it was my stomach. Thankfully no puking for me, just feeling like I could. Sooooo I called in to work. My co-worker sounded annoyed but sorry, I will be no good running back and forth to the restroom for the false alarms. Plus I have zero energy.

So that is my weekend. Good and bad.... at least its a short week!

Busy, busy, busy

I have been sooo busy doing..... I don't know. Just back to school stuff. Work. Working on my parents presentation and hanging out with Goofball.

And, too busy to even blog that today is the 1 year anniversary of my divorce being final. Wow what a great year! This time last year I felt like I was really coming back to life so to speak. I was so tense and so nervous and had little self-esteem. But I was brave and I was strong.

In the Summer of 2005, I packed up my kiddos and loaded the car and then drove from Fargo to Omaha to pick up my dad for the drive home. I really wasn't sure what the plan was. I told the ex I was just going on vacation but I did say I would look for a job. If I found one I was staying and if I didn't, I would go back to Fargo. At the time I wasn't sure would I file or would I try to make it work. I just knew I needed to do something big. I needed to find myself and make myself happy for a change.

I got married young to someone I really didn't know. I had a baby pretty quickly after and then another.... I was lost somewhere in the shuffle of figuring out how to be a mom and a wife.

I hit rock bottom once we moved to Fargo. I was isolated from my family and my comfort zone. At least I had my "girls." This is a group of ladies I meet online. If they were not out there in cyper space for, I would have lost it completely in Fargo. I loved Fargo itself but this is when a bad marriage got worse.

I started to see a therapist and he helped me to get control. Helped me take baby steps, get me back.

He would be so proud. I just know he would be.

And, ya know I am proud too.

By the way, the kids are loving being back in school. Okay maybe not loving it but they aren't bored all day. L is in Kindergarten and is adjusting to not having a nap. H is in 6th and had a little tough few days but by Friday was in the groove. K was really upset at first too. None of her friends were in any of her classes but I think she is feeling better now.

Back to school Tomorrow

Well it is that time of year again. It just amazes me how I can check off another year just like that (snap)..... If you have school-aged children, years are not always run by the calendar but by the school year.

My babies are going in to 8th grade, 6th grade and surprise of all surprises, shock of all shocks.... Kindergarten. All three will be in school, all school-agers. Wow.

When did my babies grow up? When did they change into these people?

Ah well, I love it just the same because I get to be here. I get to watch them everyday and see how much they change and grow. I feel really lucky and blessed by that.

But back to school time does come with some stress....

We have been getting them all ready. Most years it has been fairly easy to get them ready. The school has provided pre-packaged school supplies. Not this year. I have been to 7 places and STILL cannot get all the things they need. Blah! I will have to send them tomorrow without everything. Oh well. Can't be helped and by the looks of many of the other shoppers, they will be doing the same.

See on Friday, there was a small group of us that kept running into each other at the different stores. I would see the parents looking much like I felt and we would half smile at each other with that silent understanding. "This sucks ass."

And, today, the day before, I still need clothes! In this district they have standardized dress code. This just means polo shirts and khakis. No big deal but the fact that I still haven't finished has me a bit on edge.

To make matters worse, Sunday is half way over and we are still in pajamas with no effort to get ready. I have piles of laundry to wash, school supplies to label and sort, and I'm running out of time. Surprisingly, though my words sounds stressed, I actually feel somewhat at peace with this. There is just something good about being lazy especially before a big day.

But, tomorrow will come and another year will start to tick by, before I know it I will be another empty nester. I can't even think that far ahead yet.

For now, I will be happy to have them back in school. I won't be getting phone calls all day because they just can't get along. I will be once again helping with homework, projects and cutting my work day short to run kids around to activities and friends' houses.

This is my life and I am really trying to enjoy the moments. Because after all, they are just moments in time.