This past week I caught some of the Dr. Phil show. The topic was Perfectionist Mothers. I am not here to talk about Dr. Phil or debate liking him/not because I realize you either love him or hate him. Personally I love him. He doesn't claim (in my opinion) to be the answer but just to give people that common sense/wake up moment they need. He seems to offer his guests resources to help them after the show.... of course I don't know as I am not part of the show and I haven't been on it. But I can see why people might not like him.
Anyway, back on point. I can't remember if it was Dr. Phil or one of the guests but someone said something about not everyone or everything can be perfect. My thought to that was, "But why can't things be perfect for each of us?" Meaning why can't things be perfect for us.... not perfect in the "nothing goes wrong" way but perfect in the "this is just what I wanted" way, or at least most of the time.
Like if you go shopping and you find an outfit. No wait, not just any outfit but THE outfit. The one that when you put it on you just are so feeling it. Yes, this is the one. This is the perfect color for me, the perfect fit. But think about this, that same outfit might not be perfect for the person in the next dressing room. She might be trying the exact same thing on, yet she thinks, "No way. This just isn't right. The color is wrong and I don't think this fits well either." She may go through two or three more outfits before she says, "Yes this is perfect."
That is what I think perfect is. It is something different for each person. Perfect is just that. What we think is perfect for us. There is no right or wrong perfect.... it just is.
So even though it doesn't seem perfect to everyone, I think my life is pretty darn close to it. Yes, I truly, truly believe this. I have great people in my life. I have great things in my life, and goings on in my life. This is why I truly believe whatever this health problem is with me now, it is not depression and it is not anxiety. Though I do believe everyone is so focused on the anxiety part because this health issue seems to be causing the anxiety to surface, not the other way around. I am feeling sooo crazy with whatever it is. Yet I can still see how good my life is. I feel crazy and good at the same time. Perfect and wrong. Complete and empty. Light and dark....
And, I just want to enjoy my perfect life with all its imperfections. Don't you?