I have been thinking about this all day. (This might be part of my mood today)...
I blogged about this over the summer but just to recap.
This time last year the ex and I had plans to move back in together. We had not lived together in about 8-9 months. We were looking at houses because this one is just too small for us. We are people that need space. Anywho. For my birthday last year, we all took a trip to San Antonio. Neither the kiddos nor the ex had ever been out there so off we went.
Good weekend. I thought for sure things had turned and we might be able to make it work but not just because of that weekend, it was months and months of talking and listening. We were looking for a counselor, looking for a house. Well about mid-March things changed. His voice, his mannerisms, etc. I knew that was it, no turning back. We filed. I don't regret it for one minute. He moved to Dallas and we, of course, stayed here.
The days got easier, the feelings went away. I tend to be a very jealous person.... VERY jealous. So hearing about his life was hard. He had so much.... and while I had the kids, I didn't have help and they don't have him. But, even that is gone. I feel nothing.... Today I was listening to some random music, Nick Lachey's "I can't hate you anymore" came on. I guess I kind of feel like that. There have been bumps to get to this point. I haven't shared them all but the good news the bumps get smaller and farther apart.
The latest bump is that we don't talk on the phone anymore. For a while we would have regular chats, just as friends which I thought was great. But, something changed, and now we only talk via text messaging and email. That hurt for a second but ya know, I guess it is the right thing.
But, really, for me, I'm happy with my life. I cannot complain about anything.... well I could but why? I have a really great life. Great friends. My kids are wonderful!